I Hate Goodbye
by 27dayz
Summary: Gil Grissom hates goodbye, so he has a real problem when Catherine and Lindsey leave Las Vegas.


AN: I don't even know where this came from, but I love this story.

Disclaimer: I hate the fact that I don't own CSI. Nor do I own the song "EveryTime We Say Goodbye". Personally I love the Ray Charles and Betty Carter version. Point is: I don't own it

I Hate Goodbye

Gil Grissom was numb all over. There was a lump in his throat. There was a queasy feeling deep in the pit of his stomach. It was like he knew that, at that very moment, there was a small crowd of people gathered at the airport, saying their goodbyes to a strawberry blond goddess. His strawberry blond goddess. But why wasn't he there with her? Gil Grissom hated saying goodbye. To him, being at that airport meant that he was okay with losing her and her gorgeous little girl that he had come to care for like his own child. He was not okay with this. He would never be okay again.

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"Where the Hell is he?" Catherine Willows asked, glancing around the airport for her best friend.

"Maybe traffic is bad," Nick Stokes suggested, "There's no way he wouldn't be here, Cath."

"Yeah. He'll be here. Don't worry," Warrick Brown added.

"Yeah. You guys are tight, remember?" Greg Sanders joked. Catherine did not smile. Neither did Lindsey.

"I don't wanna go," she stated, crossing her arm.

"Lindsey, can we not start this again?" Catherine asked, tersely, still looking for Gil.

"But Mom! I don't wanna live in Chicago! I wanna stay here with my friends!" Lindsey protested. She had not been pleased when her mother had been transferred to Chicago. That was putting it nicely.

"Lindsey-" Catherine started crossly.

"Ah, come on, Linds, you'll love the windy city," Warrick tried to convince her. Lindsey just pouted.

"I already hate it," she mumbled, still sulking.

"Don't worry, Catherine. She'll come around," Sara Sidle offered. Catherine nodded, but was still preoccupied with searching for Gil. Where was he?

"Flight 642, Las Vegas to Chicago, now boarding passengers with limited mobility and small children," the voice of the airplane announcer called.

"Shit! Where is he?" Catherine cried, a little edgy. Why wasn't he there yet?

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Grissom leaned back in the swivelled office chair and looked at the clock. They would be boarding soon. The knots in his stomach tightened. He was going to lose her forever. He swallowed hard and picked up his cell phone.

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Catherine and Lindsey were just about to board the plane, when Catherine's cell phone chirped and died.

"No reception!" she cursed and switched the phone off as she and Lindsey continued to walk down the terminal, towards the plane that would carry her and Lindsey away from Las Vegas.

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Grissom didn't know how long he sat in his dark office; feeling like someone had ripped his heart out. It was not long before four very disgruntled people knocked and entered the office.

"Where were you?" Warrick asked, staring at his boss with a very perplexed expression on his dark features. Grissom opened his mouth to answer, but found he couldn't utter a single sound.

"Yeah, you missed Catherine, Griss," Nick added. Grissom closed his eyes and exhaled slowly.

"What's the deal?" Sara asked.

"Cath was really upset," Greg added. This was a very true fact. All four of them had seen the hurt in Catherine's eyes when she realized he was not there.

"I don't want to talk about it," Grissom choked out, exiting his own office to escape the prying eyes of his colleagues.

"What's his problem?" Greg asked, staring at his boss's retreating back.

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Not a word was uttered between Catherine and Lindsey on the plane. Lindsey just stared out the window, her tears streaming down her face as she watched Las Vegas slip out of sight. Catherine just started into space; her tears remaining unshed as she thought of how her best friend had not been there for her, like he always said he would.

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Gil Grissom was sprawled out on his bed, his tears had long since wetted his pillow as he came to grips with the fact that the only woman he had ever loved was gone.

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Lindsey hated Chicago, just like she said she would. No matter how hard her mother tried to convince her that their new life would be great, she would just scoff and lock herself in her new bedroom. It was smaller then her room in the house in Vegas. The cold chill of Chicago crept through the windowsill, chilling her to the bone. She hated it.

In an effort to help her daughter adjust to their new home, Catherine took her shopping before Lindsey started at her new school. This was not a very successful tactic. Lindsey had sulked the whole time and said that she wanted to go home. Home meaning Vegas. Lindsey's school didn't exactly appeal to the young girl's tastes either. Her classmates were weird, her teachers were weird, and her school was weird.

After that first day of school, Catherine had allowed her daughter some space. Unlike Lindsey, she actually liked her new surroundings. She had met her new team, and they were kind to her.

Work was going well for Catherine. It was her passion and drive she brought to her job that impressed everyone, especially Max Calormen, her new and extremely good-looking boss. Indeed Max Calormen was graced in the looks department. He was the kind of guy that you would never dream worked as a criminalist. He had jet back hair and warm hazel eyes that lit up his oval face. There was a small cleft in his chin that made him look distinguished and rugged at the same time. He admired her from the moment he laid eyes on her, not only because of her undeniable beauty, but also because of her brilliance and motivation in her profession. It was not long before he asked her to have dinner with him. Catherine thought he was sweet. Lindsey thought he was lame.

Ah, but there was one thing Catherine could not deny. She missed Gil, even though he stood her up at the airport. She missed their closeness and their inside jokes. She missed being privy to his thoughts. She missed being the only one who knew what he was feeling or what he wanted. She missed teasing him about his withdrawn demeanour or his insect collection. She missed his charm and dark humour that was so uniquely Grissom. She missed the dedication he had for his job and the determined glint in his eyes when he was in the middle of a tough case. Hell, she even missed his tush. Most of all, she missed him.

And Gil Grissom missed her. Maybe that was why he was the entomologist that so readily responded to Max Calormen's request for an expert on a particularly bugged out case.

"I swear this doesn't belong here," Catherine said, picking up a large black beetle from the body covered in all things insects. Calormen looked over at her.

"Why?" he asked curiously.

"It's a carpet beetle," Catherine replied, examining it closer, remembering a case with Gil in the body farm.

"What does that have to do with it?" Calormen asked.

"Carpet beetles only appear near a skeleton," it was not Catherine who answered, but the very low baritone of Gil Grissom. She whirled around to see him shyly hovering in the doorway. To Calormen, he looked standoffish. To Catherine, he looked nervous. She put the beetle down and slipped off her latex gloves as she all but ran up to him and hugged him, even though she knew it would probably embarrass him. What puzzled her was that he did not protest, but tightened the embrace.

"Oh my God, Gil, what are you doing here?" she asked after they separated. He offered her a rare smile.

"I got called in to help with your case," he answered. Calormen was feeling slightly put out.

"How do you two know each other?" he asked. Catherine smiled warmly at Gil.

"Gil Grissom was my old supervisor in Las Vegas. Gil, this is Max Calormen," she introduced.

"Your new supervisor, I presume," Gil said, extremely forced. He had seen the happy look in her eyes when she said his name. It was the same look that she got when she would say Eddie's name all those years ago.

"It's nice to meet you, Mr. Grissom," Calormen said. The two men shook hands, but both let go extremely quickly.

"So how is Vegas? How're the kids?" Catherine asked, using the nickname she and Gil created when talking about the younger members of their team. Gil smiled slightly.

"They're fine. Vegas is in ruins without its best CSI. You really should have known that, Catherine," he joked. She laughed at him.

"You and I both know that I am nowhere near the best CSI in Las Vegas, Gil," she replied.

"The Dayshift doesn't count," he joked again, and this time the two of them fell into familiar laughter. Calormen, as you can guess, did not know what was so funny, nor liked the fact that Catherine and Grissom were sharing a private joke that he was not apart of.

"Um…well, now that we've met, don't we have a body to process?" he asked, directing their attention away from each other…momentarily at least. As the three of them separated insects from the body, Gil inquired about Lindsey.

"How is she?"

"She…well…she hasn't really warmed up to the idea of living in Chicago," Catherine explained.

"Really? You two have been here for two and half months. I would've figured she'd have gotten used to it by now," Gil commented. Two months, two weeks, four days, and 6 hours to be exact. He should know; he kept track. Catherine shook her head.

"She misses Las Vegas. She thinks it's too cold here. She misses Sam and Mom and Nancy. God, she even misses Sara, Nick, Warrick, and Greg. And you. She's always talking about you…when she talks to me at least. She'll be happy to see you," Catherine told him with a small smile on her face. Gil was touched by this.

"I'd like to see her, too," he said softly.

"She's such a beautiful girl. Has her mother's looks," Calormen injected, causing Catherine to blush. Gil refrained from socking him.

"And her mother's brains, thank goodness," he muttered the last part, but Catherine heard it and smiled. Another private joke that Calormen would never know. To know what it meant, he would've had to have met Eddie Willows, which was impossible, and he would have had to know Lindsey since she was little.

After the case was wrapped up, Catherine had asked Gil if he would like to come over. He gladly accepted and it warmed his heart when Lindsey ran up to him and hugged him. They greeted each other in the usual way:

"Hi, Uncle Gil!"

"Hi, Butterfly!"

This greeting had been customary since she could talk. Catherine smiled at the familiar sight and realized just how much she and Lindsey had missed Gil.

"How long are you staying?" Lindsey asked. Gil hesitated.

"My plane leaves at five," he answered, as he watched Lindsey's face fall.

"Today?" she asked. He nodded.

"Do you have to leave so soon, Gil?" Catherine asked. He swallowed hard.

"Duty calls," he said softly, fearing the inevitable goodbye he would have to say to two of the people he cared for most of all on this earth. Again, they would be parted.

They had ate lunch together and talked about Las Vegas, and while Lindsey was in the bathroom, Catherine had to ask:

"Why didn't you say goodbye to us at the airport?" she watched Gil squirm uncomfortably.

"I-I…tried," he finally said.

"The cell phone?" she asked, "It died."

"Oh," he replied. Lindsey had come back and they resumed their other conversation. All too soon for all three, Gil had to leave.

"Don't be a stranger," Catherine said, hugging him once more.

"I won't," he said, "I'll see you two later."

"Goodbye, Uncle Gil," Lindsey said sadly. She hugged him too.

"Goodbye, Butterfly," And then he turned out the door and left, tears in his eyes as he walked down the sidewalk. Tears in his eyes when Lindsey accosted him halfway down the walk.

"Why didn't you say goodbye to us at the airport?" she asked, her eyes blazing, looking more and more like Catherine each minute. He hesitated.

"I hate saying goodbye, especially to two people who mean the world to me," he answered, kneeling down so he was at eye level with her. At this she saw the tears well up in his eyes. For some reason, it was so much easier for him to open up to Lindsey rather than an adult. Maybe it was because she could understand his reasoning. Lindsey hugged him tightly.

"I don't like saying goodbye to you either, Uncle Gil," she whispered into his shoulder. Then they parted and she smiled at him.

"So let's just say see you soon," she suggested. He smiled too.

"See you soon, Butterfly," he replied.

"See you soon, Uncle Gil."

With that he walked away and soon was on a plane back to Las Vegas. On the plane, he wondered why he felt like jumping out the window. He wondered why he was there. He wondered why he had said goodbye.

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The months had passed for Catherine and Lindsey. Lindsey no longer complained about everything, something that, Catherine was sure, was Gil's doing. They talked more and were more open, but oddly enough, Lindsey never mentioned to her mother of Gil's unwillingness to say goodbye. Catherine, on the other hand, was still enjoying her new work life. This could have had something to do with she and Max Calormen going on more than one date. Lindsey still thought he was a tool and was way too mechanically suave, but she held her tongue for her mother's sake. True, Calormen was polite and thoughtful, but he would have done anything so that Catherine would give him the time of day. That's why he had asked Catherine to accompany him to a seminar in Las Vegas. Catherine was more than happy to oblige him. Lindsey was more than happy to beg Catherine to let her go with them.

They arrived in Las Vegas early. They checked into the Rampart, where Sam Braun graciously greeted his daughter and granddaughter. Then they decided to drop in on the Las Vegas Crimelab. Catherine had missed the building and walking through those doors felt just as natural as it had when she had worked there. Everything was the same…including a complaining Greg Sanders.

"I don't wanna go! I have to sit two seats away from Ecklie! It's Hell on earth!" a suit-clad Greg was pouting to Sara, also dressed up. She rolled her eyes at him.

"Just be glad you aren't Grissom," she quipped, putting up with none of Greg's complaints. Lindsey broke into a grin and ran up to Greg and hugged him around the middle.

"Hi, Greg!" she exclaimed. Greg seemed a little star-struck.

"H-Hey Linds," he said, staring at her. Lindsey let go of him and turned to Sara.

"Hi, Sara," she said grinning. Catherine and Max approached them.

"Ah, I remember the days when I was under Ecklie's thumb. Not fun is it?" Catherine teased. After she received a hug from both Greg and Sara, which surprised her slightly, Greg explained his predicament.

"He's making the whole nightshift sit beside him! We can't even skip the boring parts!" he explained. Catherine laughed at him and introduced Calormen. Then Nick and Warrick came walking up to them, both in handsome suits.

"_Every time we say goodbye, I die a little_," Nick sang.

"_Every time we say goodbye, I wonder why a little_," Warrick joined in. Sara grimaced.

"I hate that song!" she exclaimed vehemently. Catherine looked perplexed.

"Why? What's wrong with it?" she asked.

"Grissom," they all said at the same time.

"I swear every time you go in that office, he has that stupid song is playing!" Sara exclaimed. Greg scoffed.

"Don't you mean funeral march?" he asked.

"It's so depressing!" Nick agreed. Warrick nodded.

"It's enough to suck the fun outta Greg," he commented dryly. Catherine raised an eyebrow and marched down the familiar halls to Gil Grissom's office. It was dark and indeed, the soft crooning of Ray Charles could be heard. Gil had always preferred Ray Charles. She opened it without knocking. He was sitting at his desk, staring off in space. His head snapped over to her and as soon as he realized who had barged into his office, he stood and approached her, a wide grin spread over his face. He was wearing a dark suit, like the rest of his shift.

"Catherine!" he said almost excitedly, briefly hugging her.

"Hey, you!" she said, smiling.

"Are you here for the seminar at the Tangiers?" he asked.

"Yeah. Me, Max, and Lindsey," she told him. His brilliant grin faltered at Max Calormen's name.

"That's great!" he said regardless, switching off his CD player.

"So I hear you guys have assigned seats," she commented as they walked through the halls together. He rolled his eyes.

"Right next to the boss," he groaned. She winked at him.

"I'll save you," she quipped. He looked over at her.

"You'd better," he threatened.

"Or what?" she asked, the teasing air in her voice.

"Or I won't treat you to dinner later," he replied. She grinned.

"Deal," He smiled too when she said this. They finally made their way to the entrance, where his CSIs gaped at his wide smile.

"Hi, Uncle Gil!" Lindsey ran to him. He hugged her, further surprising his team.

"Hi, Butterfly!" he said as he let her go, "What are you doing while your mom is at the seminar?" he asked.

"Hanging out with Grandma and Grandpa," she replied. Indeed, while Gil was suffering through the seminar, Lindsey was at the zoo with her grandparents and her aunt and cousin. As promised, Gil's suffering was quickly appeased when he received a text message from Catherine inquiring where they were going to eat. They texted each other throughout the whole meeting, undetected by Ecklie, of course. Calormen noticed and wasn't pleased. He was even less happy when Catherine announced she was going to dinner with Gil. The two men barely acknowledged each other.

"What am I going to do?" he asked. Catherine rolled her eyes.

"I'm sure you'll find something. I just really want to have dinner with him. I haven't seen him in six months. He's my best friend, Max," she explained.

"Whatever," he sighed and drove back to the Rampart, while Catherine stayed at the seminar with Gil. He drove her to a quaint little café, a few blocks away from 'The French Palace'. She recognized it immediately.

"This is where you took me for a bite right after we met," she said as they were seated. He smiled, glad she remembered.

"Best night of my life," he replied. She laughed.

"I'm sure. I got a free meal and you didn't get laid," she quipped.

"No. Truly," he said. They shared smiles and talked for ages, before Gil finally drove her back to the Rampart.

It was a three-day seminar and again, Catherine saved him from boredom. This time Catherine didn't stay with just Gil. She stayed with the whole team. They ate dinner at the usual restaurant, where the nightshift watched as Gil and Catherine reminisced, laughing and talking animatedly. Again they were struck dumb at their boss's sudden character change. Gil even paid for all of them. The third day passed in the same manner, except Max and Lindsey joined the CSIs for dinner. Calormen was sulking the entire time.

The next day, it started to pour, fitting Gil Grissom's mood perfectly. Catherine, Lindsey, and Calormen were leaving. The group said their goodbyes at the Crimelab.

"See you soon, Uncle Gil," Lindsey whispered, hugging him.

"See you soon, Butterfly," he whispered back. He hugged Catherine one last time. He stuck around to watch her, Lindsey, and Calormen walk out the door and into their rental car. Then he turned on his heel and briskly walked towards his office. Even he, the master of concealing emotions, could not disguise the pain on his face.

"What's his problem?" Greg asked, staring down the hall. All four of them saw his pained expression. Sara spoke first.

"I think he loves her." Nick, Warrick, and Greg all stared at her.

"This is coming from the woman who asked the boss out?" Warrick asked. She hit him on the shoulder.

"Oh, shut up. I think it kills him every time he says goodbye to them," she observed.

"Come to think of it, these last three days have been the happiest I've seen him in like ever," Greg added. The others nodded in agreement.

"Let's do something about this," Nick suggested.

"Why?" Greg asked. Nick shook his head.

"Do you want to keep listening to 'Every time we say goodbye'?" he asked. Greg paused.

"Onward, men! Woman!" he said, leading the way to Grissom's already darkened office. Nick was the one bold enough to turn the handle and he and the rest barged into their boss's office.

"What are you four doing?" Grissom snapped, not looking pleased.

"What are you doing?" Warrick reciprocated. Grissom was struck dumb at this.

"What?" Warrick answered his question.

"What are you doing here while Catherine, Lindsey, and that robot, Calormen, are getting on a plane back to Chicago?" he asked. Grissom shook his head.

"Where else would I be?" he asked, regarding his team as if they lost their minds.

"With Catherine right now," Nick stated. This was not the answer Grissom had been expecting. He tried to speak, but found he couldn't.

"You love her, Grissom. She loves you too," Sara said slowly. Finally Grissom spoke.

"She does?" he asked.

"I don't know. Go ask her for yourself," Sara responded, with a smile.

"I-I can't-"

"Why not? You'll never know if you don't try," Greg spoke up.

"Take a gamble, Griss. What have you got to lose?" Warrick asked.

"Besides her?" Grissom asked, doubting himself. Nick scowled.

"What's worse: getting rejected or wondering what could have been?" he asked.

"She's been your best friend for years, Griss. That kind of companionship doesn't come around that often," Greg added.

"If she only liked you as a friend, then why has she stuck by you all of these years?" Sara asked him. There was still doubt lingering in his eyes.

"Then why did she leave?"

"Because you didn't stop her at the airport the first time. Come on, Griss. This is your chance to redeem yourself," Warrick pleaded.

"When she is around, you're happy, Grissom. These last three days were the happiest we've ever seen you," Sara said.

"Don't let her walk away again, boss. You're miserable without Catherine," Nick observed.

"Please!" Greg begged, "I won't be able to take any more 'Every Time We Say Goodbye'! I'll quit!"

"I second that," Sara agreed.

"Me too," Nick added.

"Go get her, or you'll lose your team," Warrick threatened. All four of them crossed their arms stubbornly. Grissom stared for a moment and then laughed.

"Well, I can't let you guys quit," he said, rising from his chair, grabbing his jacket, and ran down the halls.

"YES!" all four exclaimed.

"What's going on? I just saw Grissom run out of here?" Brass said, poking his head in the office.

"He's going after her!" Sara giggled, leaning on Nick for support.

Grissom fumbled with his keys in the rain and in a matter of minutes, he was heading down the strip to the airport. What Nick, Warrick, Sara, and Greg said made sense and it drove him on. They were right. He needed her. He loved her. But as it always occurs, someone up there conspires against us when we have something we need to do. It seemed like Grissom had waited for ages behind an accident and the traffic on the strip was worse than it had ever been.

Finally he pulled to a stop in front of the airport and ran through the doors. His heart fell when he saw that the flight to Chicago had already departed.

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Silent tears streamed down Lindsey's face as she once again watched Las Vegas fade in the plane window. She was surprised when her mother wrapped her arms around her and she felt Catherine's own tears on her head. Calormen was saying that it was a shame they had to leave. Lindsey wished he would just shut up.

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Grissom didn't know how long he stood staring at the message board, but he was finally pulled out of his state by his cell phone ringing.

"Grissom! What happened?" Warrick's voice asked on the other end.

"She's gone," he said in just over a whisper.

"Oh, man, I'm so sorry. Are you coming back to the lab?" Warrick asked sadly. Grissom did not answer for a moment. He was overcome with a sense of daring that really only ever showed itself around Catherine.

"No," he said, "I'm taking a gamble." With that, he snapped the phone shut and ran up to the nearest counter.

"Can I help you?" the lady asked, taking in his drenched appearance.

"I need to get to Chicago immediately!" he panted.

"You just missed the flight to Chicago," she said, typing on her computer.

"I know," he groaned, "but I need your next available flight, or a connecting flight. I don't care. I just need to get to Chicago, immediately." He hoped as she continued to type away.

"There is one. It stops in Denver and arrives in Chicago at 7:00 pm," she told him.

"That's great. When does the other plane to Chicago arrive?" he asked.

"6:55 pm," she answered. He smiled.

"That's perfect. I need one ticket," he said.

She printed him off one and then directed him to his terminal, "Your flight boards in five minutes," she said. With that he ran through the airport, whizzed his way through security, and arrived at his terminal just in time. He smiled as he watched Las Vegas fade away.

His plane got into Chicago five minutes late, but he was hardly upset. The adrenaline was pumping to fast for him to hear anything else. It was do or die. He ran through the airport, stopping in the baggage claim, looking for a familiar face.

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Catherine was not pleased. The airlines had left her luggage back in Las Vegas and she was in the middle of filling out a complaint. Lindsey was trying to drone out Calormen's boring voice. He was now talking about how unreliable the airlines were.

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Gil's heart leapt with excitement when he saw Catherine and Lindsey at the counter. He rushed towards her.

"Catherine!" he called.

She whirled around at his familiar voice.

"Gil! What are you doing here?" she asked, shocked. Lindsey's mouth was wide open.

"What are you doing here?" Calormen asked, not even hiding the contempt in his voice. Gil ignored him.

"Catherine, I should have told you this six months ago. Don't leave. Come back home," he pleaded.

"Gil-" Catherine was too shocked to speak.

"Please, Cath! These last six months have been Hell for me. I miss you! I can't function without you. You are one of the most important people in my life and I can't lose you again. I wanted you to stay in Las Vegas. I need you. You've always been my best friend and I guess I always should have said that since the moment I met you. I'm a different person when you're around. I'm more like myself. I always thought that if I never let anybody get to close to me, I'd never get hurt. I was wrong. I hurt so much more because I never let you get close to me. You know more about me then anyone else ever has. Maybe you don't know this; maybe you do. I hate saying goodbye to you, Catherine. I kills me because I love you," he explained, and after this brilliant speech, he faltered, asking, "I-I was wondering if you felt the same."

He stared at her and for a moment, she did not know what to say. He took this as a bad sign.

"Of course she doesn't," Calormen said, disgusted, "Why do you think she left in the first place?" he spat. This emotional blow hit Gil and he couldn't bear to look at Catherine's stunned expression. With the silence ringing in his ears, he turned his back in a miserable gesture.

"Goodbye, Catherine," he choked out, quickly walking away.

"Well, now that was awkward," Calormen commented arrogantly. Catherine rounded on him.

"You son of a bitch!" WHACK! Her hand connected with his cheek in lightning speed. He stumbled back. Lindsey cheered.

Catherine then turned on her heel and ran after Gil Grissom, the man she cared about as more than a best friend.

"Gil!" she called, looking for him. She found him miserably blinking back tears behind a pillar.

"Gil," she said softly, catching his attention. He looked at her, desperately trying to hold back his tears. She reached out and wrapped her arms around his neck. He was thoroughly confused, but responded when her lips met his. Their kiss grew in passion and intensity and only broke off when both could not breathe.

"I love you too, Gil," she said, staring into his brilliant blue eyes. He laughed as tears of joy flowed down his face. He moved to kiss her again. Lindsey interrupted them.

"Can we go home now?" she asked. Both Catherine and Gil laughed and they held out their arms for her to come over to them.

"Yes. Definitely," Catherine laughed, hugging her daughter.

With that, Catherine, Gil, and Lindsey booked the next flight back home to Las Vegas.

The End


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